We continue with the Fifth Mandala…
It is important to understand that a facet of personal enlightenment is awareness. Through awareness comes an understanding of the mistakes the role models in our lives made in the past. We need to find awareness so we do not react blindly in the present and repeat similar mistakes ourselves. It should come as no great surprise that our parents can make mistakes. We all do. The key to understanding the past is to realize that the people who affect us in a negative fashion are probably hurting as well. This could be parents, coworkers or simply someone random off the street. Instead of feeling hatred or reacting blindly to a negative situation, we should feel compassion. Yet, the most important factor to acknowledge is that in order to break negative control patterns set by role models of our past and present; we must remember and analyze their actions; thus, creating an awareness or mental trigger that shapes our reactions in the future. Shattering negative control patterns is instrumental in raising emotionally happy children of your own, children who will, in turn, become positive role models themselves. We can be reflections of our own parent’s and those that influence us on a daily basis. Once we recognize poor patterns of behavior passed down through generations, we can break the circle of dysfunction and change the future for the better. Likewise, we should embrace positive memories and positive actions from role models to facilitate future models of behavior and teachings.
Fifth Mandala excerptI think we all understand that when we are in a good mood and things are going well in life, we have a general feeling of happiness that creates peace of mind. We can even discipline ourselves to focus on what makes us happy to perpetuate this productive peace of mind. Yet, harboring hatred for someone, no matter how evil he or she is, is unproductive. We all have experienced emotions of hatred; whether it is rooted to our childhood memories or someone in the present, this element of hate is worth addressing. Just the mere thought of your hatred will overwhelm what was once an aware and settled mind. It will destroy your ability to judge right from wrong and throw you into a state of confusion. Hatred breeds negativity and control patterns. It is healthy to confront negative elements of the past and present, but it is unhealthy to hold onto hate.
Hatred is a mental cancer that will eat you up inside. Instead of holding onto hate, we have to make room in our minds to step back and evaluate the entire situation. This person you hate must have negative control patterns of his or her own. People who cause you harm cannot be happy themselves. We must understand that they are suffering in some way. Evaluating the situation as a whole and allowing yourself to feel some level of sympathy for your combatant will allow you to release your hatred.
Dealing with past hatred is particularly difficult. It is never easy for forget pain and sorrow. The only way to process this negativity and move past it is to confront it. In doing so, we become better able to understand the source of the issues that plague us. Many times, it is difficult to maneuver through the past because many of the issues that plague you are hardwired into your subconscious. The past can blur into a confusing and smothering tapestry of memories. If that is the case, therapy is a great direction to take. A therapist’s job is to pick apart the threads of this tapestry through questions and reasoning. They have unique and effective methods to dig deep into the past and help us learn how to understand the control patterns that continue to hinder our lives. Seeking help is always a positive step in preserving a happy future. Creating awareness, understanding your past, and releasing hatred will allow you to make space to push out memories of anger, abuse and pain, and replace them with thoughts and memories of positivity and happiness.
John C. Bader
www.responsiveuniverse.com
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